emotions running high

After the kind of euphoria of leaving work on Friday, the weekend proved itself to be challenging and awesome in equal measure.

Awesome to see so many family and friends who took the time to come and see us before we head to Australia. Ate nice food (duck and dauphinoise potatoes - yumma), drank my pink Australian sparkling rose wine from my work colleagues - that is also available in Oz, I checked! Ate cake on Sunday with friends and more family who came round to the house - coffee and walnut and victoria sponge. Classics. Had some traditional Welsh songs sang by an old boy. It will be lovely to look back on that night in times to come.

Challenging - I think boyfriend and I are having a tag team of having stress outs! We had a heart-to-heart when we were together on Saturday, then we were ok until we had a disagreement via the phone before bed yesterday. It disrupted my sleep as I was upset and wound up and feeling defensive. I woke up today thinking the feeling would continue but its gone. I felt calm and productive and determined. I still do. I feel bad for not feeling bad.

I think its cause I'm at my parents house alone to crack on with things. I've got the laptop on the table, hot drinks on tap and had left over coffee and walnut cake for breakfast. I've applied for another job, closed accounts (I'm up £6 from my topshop account, 23p from a little used current account and closed 2 isas with some residual funds in). I can't move with having multiple accounts here, there and everywhere. Its also allowing to bin alot of paperwork which feels great. I've got the car valeted as its going to its new owner on Saturday. I've washed and dried some clothes.

I do feel selfish having this day alone as my boyfriend needs my support too but its been a godsend to get stuff done so I will have more time for him.

Also when I got the car valeted, I went into the local town. I always find it quite depressing when I go there. I don't remember street names anymore, shops/pubs/cafes from my schooldays have closed or been replaced by new ones. There wasn't many people around because it was tipping it down and its a Monday, so all-in-all, it felt like a town on its downers not on its uppers. It reminds me that I hark back to something/somewhere that doesn't exist anymore.

Onwards for us and 8 days to go!!!!!

Sunny x